she stimulates my bowels

I don’t know what it is with her, but everytime I talk to her, everytime i think of her, I feel like crapping. This has been the case for the last three years. The first time I met her, I had to excuse myself after ten minutes. And that seems to have set a trend.

When I was putting blade two years back, the blade would always be preceded by a round of download. The routine was something like “hey are you free? can I call you now?” and then go put download. While i was washing my arse, I’d hear an incoming SMS. And would then proceed to call her.

This kept continuing for a while. Things between us changed, but this particular thing hasn’t stopped. Even now, whenever I talk to her, I need to make a run. Run, I mean, in the sense that English players talk about when they are touring India.

I remember Tommy telling me a couple of years back that if you become a regular smoker, then you won’t be able to crap unless you have a smoke. This, he said, was the reason most smokers would start their day with a puff or two.

Drawing an analogy, I think I can say that she is my cigarette.??

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