random….

every extra minute more i spend here in office, the more frustrated i become. as i had mentioned earlier, the IT systems here are pretty poor. hardly world class. and if this indeed is world class, then i’m proud (??!!) to say that many of our PSUs are also world class.

the last couple of days in office have been spent trying to check the work of a bunch of jokers called “middle office”. those guys don’t even consider it a shame for an intern to check on their work and to send them corrections!! and to imagine the better performers in there actually get promoted to normal investment banking!! ah, the high standards JPM has set!!

i was priding myself the other day for not having gotten depressed for the past 3 months (after a couple of months of unwarranted paranoia about grades and career, which i’m now out of). but of late, following the comments of a few friends, i feel i’m prone to depression in the next few days.

basically it goes like this:
i hate my job. it is extremely mundane. at least if a small portion of it was non-routine work it would’ve made my days. however, that is not the case to be. i mean, it is a really boring job. and i’m not helped by the systems (i’m repeating myself) or the lack of it at JPM. well, i’m really pissed and it’s very very unlikely i’m going to come back if offered.

however, no one other than my parents seem to believe that my job sucks. most people are like “every job is like that. there is no such thing as an interesting job. come and see our jobs, yours will actually be rocknig. and remember that you’re getting paid a really huge amount”, etc. now, that gives me the impression that since mine is the most interesting job (according to all these people) and i don’t find it interesting, i won’t find any job interesting. which means that i’m doomed to mundane jobs for the rest of my life. which means that after the one year of student life i have left in me (assuming i don’t do a PhD), i’m basically kinda screwed for life. i won’t fit into any organization – i’m too rebellious for that. blah blah…

back to other stuff now… my mid-term review suggested i’ll get a PPO. which would be damn useful for my finals. now teh way i’m going, it’s unlikely i’ll crack it… as in i’ve been openly protestnig against the kind of stuff being given to me… trying to drill management gyaan into my associates’ heads… my manager tried to place me with a couple of other desks which have more ‘interesting’ jobs… but they didn’t seem too enthusiastic to recruit…

no idea as to what will come out of this… hoping for the best…

Put Comment